Stagnation

Sorry this post is so late, I was busy today (by "busy" I mean I wasted the better part of my day and then had to go grocery shopping).

Anyway, last night in class we worked on blocking punches. We had to partner up again, and this time I ended up working with the young girl's mom. (To go off on a bit of a tangent here for a second, I actually think it's pretty cool that they're taking the class together. I feel like sharing an activity like that could be a good way to strengthen any relationship.) Unfortunately, I wasn't really any more comfortable hitting the mom than I was hitting the daughter, mostly because the mom didn't seem particularly comfortable with being hit. I guess we did okay overall, but it's just not feeling like I'm getting much of anywhere with this anymore. As I have said before, what I really need is someone who will just kick my ass until I learn to defend myself. Enough with this gentle practice with people who don't actually want to fight shit!

Ⓥ How Much Like Us?

I have always found it very difficult to decide where to draw the line when it comes to treating non-human animals as equal to humans. I believe wholeheartedly that they deserve every bit of consideration that humans do. The problem is that there are some inherent differences in the way they think and feel versus the way we do. How are we ever to know how things really affect them?

I often find myself thinking about living the way animals do, even the ones who are loved and cared for, and thinking how miserable it would be. Then I look at them and they don't seem to be bothered by it. I always wonder if I just can't see that they are unhappy, or if things really feel that different to them.

I think the boredom alone would be too much for me to deal with. As far as I can tell, all the animals in my care basically sleep all day and night. I can't even imagine having nothing to do but sleep all the time, yet that seems to be what they want to do. I wonder if there is something I could do to make their lives more interesting, or if they would still choose to lay around all day no matter what I did.

These are things that have always troubled me, but Riley and Tuni, my adopted pigs, create even more of a dilemma. I just don't know how to handle their physical circumstances or their social situation. In the past, I've always done everything I could to stop any one of my animals from bullying any other. However, with Riley and Tuni, there is very little I can do. With their size, I can't actually stop them from fighting if they want to. When I interned at Farm Sanctuary, I learned about the social hierarchy in pig herds, and apparently one pig picking on the next pig is just the way things are done. I just don't like it though; I keep thinking how awful it would be to be the smaller pig and to know that I was going to be pushed around every day. I don't know though, is it something that bothers them the way it would me? or is it just something they accept?

The thing that I worry about most though, when it comes to Riley and Tuni, is the weather. It has been so very cold here recently, and there are few things in this world that I find more uncomfortable than cold. Since I, obviously, can't bring them inside I keep wondering what I can do to make things more comfortable for them. I imagine them laying in the barn huddled and shivering. Then I look out in the field and see them walking around in the ice and snow, seemingly oblivious to the frigid temperatures.

For the most part, I have basically lived under the assumption that the best way to understand another being's state of mind is to try to imagine myself in his or her situation. I'm beginning to realize though, that may not be an accurate representation. The problem is, if that doesn't work, what does? How can we know when we should be doing more to make our companion animals happy, and when we should just accept that they have different needs than we do?

As much as I would like to, this is just not feasible when you're talking about pigs.

Well That's Pretty Cool

I just read the Legion book series (or the first two, anyway. There damn well better be a third one, since the second one left on a rather ridiculous cliff-hanger). I decided to read them because I found this article on Buzzfeed that said anyone who liked Supernatural should read these books. They actually were pretty similar, a little more teenage social drama than I generally like, but other than that they were quite good.  Anyway, part of the first book was set in WV, which is cool since half the country doesn't even know we're a state, and the WV State Penitentiary (our, supposedly haunted, old prison) was a fairly major part of the story. So yeah, I was pretty happy about that. Plus, it reminded me that I've never actually been to the state penitentiary, and this is a situation which I need to remedy.

What Are the Odds?

I actually got my tax refund yesterday. I went to the bank's website to check my account balance, to see whether or not I could afford to pay my credit card bill, and was startled and bewildered by the amount. At first, I thought someone at the bank must have made a mistake, and then I remembered that I had my refund direct deposited and was pretty excited to realize that it was, in fact, my money.

Anyway, now that I have it, I really need to open a savings account, so that I won't end up just spending it all. I haven't had a savings account in years, because this is the first time in years that I've had even a tiny bit of extra money. I keep hoping that, if I actually have a savings account, I'll see it when I go to check my balance and be motivated to add money to it from time to time. Then maybe, someday, I'll have enough money to do something worthwhile. But, then again, what are the odds of that actually happening? Probably not good....

Thanks, Effie! 

Clearly a Scam

Every once in a while, I decide that I'm finally going to figure out what I'm doing with my life. Then I spend hours and hours reading articles about possible careers, only to realize that, yeah, I still have no fucking clue what I'm doing with my life. So, today, after I finished that, I started taking various career tests to see if they could offer any insight. Well, not a single one of them said that I should be a demon hunter, and vampire slayer, or a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. So I'm just going to assume that they're bullshit.

So Far, So Good

I just thought I would let you guys know that I once again have my own computer. My dad took pity on me and bought me a Chromebook, which was really nice of him. Now I can actually do stuff online without having to plan my life around times when other people aren't going to be using their computers, which will be a nice change of pace. Now as long as the curse doesn't take this one too, I'll be good to go. I've had it for a couple of days now, and it still seems to be working fairly well, so we're off to a good start.

Perhaps I should leave it somewhere else until I have a chance to check my house for hex bags, just in case. 

It Just Doesn't Seem Right

Yesterday, I was so pissed off about the weather that I forgot to tell you guys about class on Friday. We had three new people in class, so we ended up pairing up and practicing together. This was fine except for the fact that I was paired up with a girl who I would honestly estimate to be around fourteen years old. She was actually quite good, but it just feels like there's something inherently wrong about an adult kicking a kid, no matter the kid's level of skill. So, basically, I spent the entire class looking totally incompetent because I just couldn't bring myself to actually use any real force with her. Not that I ever look especially competent anyway, but you know.