Pheromones

I've been thinking about pheromones the last few days. 

Just In Case I Get Ax-Murdered

Sorry if this is super morbid......I thought it was funny....

Tree Climbing and Other Childish Things (Video)

I just felt like acting like a dip-shit today. 

Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A?

My dad and I have been watching Hemlock Grove, on DVD because we can't get Netflix at his house. I thought that it was pretty safe to watch season one because season two had already been released on blu-ray (for $60.00, for ten episodes!) so surely the DVDs would be out anytime. So, ever since we started season one, I've been checking Amazon every couple of days for season two DVDs. Well, we finished season one a couple of days ago and there was still no sign of them.

I've already watched both seasons twice, but I'm still dying to watch it again, and my dad really likes it and wants to know what happens next. So we have both been pretty annoyed by the lack of season two DVDs. A while back we managed to find "Hemlock Grove Season 2 (Region 2) DVDs", but I was kind of iffy about that, because I wasn't really sure what the difference was. I mean, I knew that meant they were originally released in another country, but I didn't know if they would be different somehow. So I kept waiting.....and waiting......and finally, yesterday, I just said "fuck it!" and ordered them.

Then today, I happened across another set of DVDs from region two. These had a disclaimer which said "Region two; Won't play in most American or Canadian DVD players." SHIT! I assumed, if there was a difference it would be within the show itself (like it would be edited differently or something) I never considered the possibility that the disks wouldn't even work. And here's the really annoying part, it's not even a difference in the players, it's just in the way they are programmed. So, at some point, some asshole was like "Hey, we can't have these people selling DVDs from one country to another, let's program some weird protocol into the players that won't let them play foreign shows." Fuck that guy!

Fortunately (maybe) there are supposedly cheat codes you can use to make your player "region free." I guess we'll just have to wait until the disks get here, and give it a shot.

Oh we're ready. We are so ready. 

Pretty Twisted

I don't even remember how this came about, but a few days ago my mom and I were talking about nightmares. I said that most of the dreams that I actually remember (which is a pretty small number) are what most people would probably consider nightmares. Usually I seem to dream about awful things happening. Yet, I don't mind them the way I imagine most people do. The truth is, my real life is so fucking boring that I would rather be chased by a serial killer or something than wake up and do fucking dishes, and laundry, and whatever other meaningless bullshit I have planned for that day. This is not a healthy attitude. Oh well, at least I still have a few Deadpool comics left to read, and they released the trailer for Supernatural season 11. As long as I can immerse myself in enough fiction, I can usually (usually) tune out real-life enough to get through the day.

Camper Update 2 (Video)

Since my sister and I still haven't managed to procure a reaper (I'm still hoping we have time before the end of the pepper growing season) and, therefore, I was not able to do another pepper review this week, I decided to just do a quick update on the camper. Sorry, I know that's not nearly as interesting as watching me try to burn myself to death from the inside out.

Busy Busy Busy

Sorry there was no post yesterday, it was kind of a crazy day.

First, my dad and I took a trailer full of stuff from the camper to the dump (always fun).

Actually, that wasn't first. While we were trying to finish loading the trailer, I kept hearing a kitten crying. I know I've bitched about the excessive number of cats at my dad's house before, so yeah, we pretty much always have kittens around. But this one sounded like it was coming form the pig field, needless to say that is a terrible place for a kitten to be. So I walked through the pig field trying to figure out where he was. Naturally, Tuni assumed that the only reason I could possibly be in her field was that I wanted to wrestle with her, so she kept grunting at me and trying to push me over. I finally got to the opposite end of the field and realized that the kitten was not, in fact, in the pig field, but in the tiny area between the pig field and the yard where my dad's dogs are. So I had to climb over the fence, crawl under a bunch of shrubbery to get to him, then climb back through the shrubbery while trying to hold onto him. Also, I'm fairly certain this particular kitten was on the porch the previous day, which means he had to go through the dogs' yard to get to where he was, not a good idea!

Anyway, after that we went to the dump.

Then we went to Lowe's to buy (hopefully) most of the rest of the supplies we will need to finish the camper.

Then, as soon as we got back, I turned around and went back to Clarksburg with my sister, to get groceries.

Then we got stuck in a ridiculous thunder storm.

Then it was 10:00 and I really just didn't give enough of a shit to write a blog post. Anyway, I think I will write my animal rightsy post tomorrow.  

P.S. We're doing my Typhoid Mary shoot tonight!

P.P.S. I chose this picture of Mary because I'm pretty sure this is what I looked like climbing through the brush trying to get to that kitten. 

Shocking

Well, surprise surprise, I didn't sell anything at the artist fair. My sister gave out some business cards, but that was it. I pretty much sat there and read Deadpool (and then a novel, after I finished the volume of Deadpool I had) for six hours. Then we went home. Super productive.

My dad and I did get a little but of work done of the camper today. We got the water lines into the well, and got the pump put together (for the most part). Next week, we're going to try to get the electrical lines over to the pump house, so we can make sure the pump works. Then we have about 8000 other things that we still need to do. So yeah, it's still going to be a while.

Speaking of shocking, in this issue, Deadpool did his version of The Aristocrats and I found it pretty hilarious (don't judge me!).

Give It a Shot

Today my sister and I are going to Connector Art's artist and artisan fair in Fairmont, at Palatine Park, if you get a chance you should come check it out. I'm not holding out much hope for actually selling anything, based on past experience with this sort of thing, but you never know I guess. It seems like it might be kind of fun though.

On a totally unrelated note, I think I have everything I need for my Typhoid Mary photo shoot. My swords came yesterday, and I bought the last little pieces for the outfit. I still have to paint the swords and do a little bit of sewing and whatnot. Other than that it's basically ready though. I thinks it's going to be pretty fucking cool.

Riley and Tuni's First Post

Anyone who followed my blog probably noticed that I didn't exactly deliver on my promise to chronicle my experience at Farm Sanctuary. There are several reasons for this, which I am not going to get into right now. Lets just say that the main reason was my usual lack of motivation. Since I didn't write anything for the two months I spent in Watkins Glen, I felt kind of ridiculous just starting back where I left off when I got back. So I have been waiting for a good topic to start back on. I think this is about as good as I could have hoped for.

Here is a bit of backstory. While I was interning at Farm Sanctuary I met two wonderful piglets, Riley and Petunia. They were adorable and sweet and I (and, I'm pretty sure, everyone else who met them) fell in love with them instantly. Petunia was brand new to the farm and overflowing with energy and enthusiasm. Riley was a bit older and more reserved, but just as friendly and loving despite the trauma he had endured before finding his way to Farm Sanctuary.

Riley was rescued from a stockyard by a brave and compassionate Farm Sanctuary employee who witnessed his suffering and saved him from a painful death. Despite the best efforts of everyone at the farm and the veterinary staff at Cornell, Riley was left blind in one eye and with his head permanently tilted to one side from a severe infection. Petunia was born with a hernia and was "donated" to Cornell so that veterinary students could practice performing surgery on her. She would have been euthanized had it not been for the fact that Cornell was very familiar with Farm Sanctuary. They agreed to save her if Farm Sanctuary would pay for the surgery. So after her surgery she came to live at the farm.

I got to know Riley and Petunia very well during my internship and was very sad to think of leaving them when it was over. About a week before my last day, the shelter director mentioned that she was planning to adopt out Riley and Petunia. As soon as I heard that, I knew that I had to be the one to adopt them. Thankfully, she agreed that I would make a good pig guardian. So when I got back to West Virginia my dad and I started work on a fence and a barn. After a very lengthy process, and a lot of help from my co-workers, we ended up with a charming, mint-green, barn and an acre of pasture. Then we just had to wait for them to arrive.  

The staff at Farm Sanctuary scheduled Riley and Petunia's arrival for 8:00am July 9th. I spent the last couple of days before they got here making sure that everything was just right, to make the transition as easy as possible for them. I woke up at 5:00 on the 9th, and sat around for hours waiting for the truck from Farm Sanctuary, and worrying about all the things that could go wrong. At 10:30 they finally arrived.

Apparently the two men entrusted with Riley and Petunia had left Watkins Glen at midnight and driven straight through. But their GPS had decided to take the scenic route and had gotten them lost in the ridiculous labyrinth that is the back roads of West Virginia. The fact that they didn't just turn back is rather remarkable to me. Instead they somehow managed to guide an enormous trailer up and down the most narrow, winding, pot-hole-infested "roads" you can imagine and find their way to a place most people, even in this area, have never heard of. For that, they have my utmost respect and gratitude. 

 I had prepared myself for the fact that Riley and Petunia would be extremely upset by the whole moving process and terrified by their completely alien surroundings. I was ready to give them their space and wait patiently for the day when they would finally get to know me again and let me come near them. I was sure that they would not remember me, and therefore probably not trust me at all. I half expected them to hide in their barn and cower whenever I came by. It turns out this was not something I needed to worry about.

When they arrived, they stepped out of the trailer as if it was completely natural for them to be on the road for ten and a half hours and then find themselves in a place they have never seen before surrounded by people they don't know. As soon as my parents and I went into the barn, they acted like we were all old friends. I like to think it's, at least partly, because they remembered me but this may just be wishful thinking. I'm pretty sure I would never associate me, as I look now, with me, as I looked all bundled up in layer upon layer of thick clothing and the absurdly bright, orange, tasseled hat I wore the entire time I was at the farm. But whatever the reason, their immediate friendliness alleviated much of my anxiety about the whole thing.

Riley and Petunia have now been living with me for over a week and I think we are starting to get the kinks worked out of our system. My dad and I built them a pond to discourage swimming in the water bowl, which seems to have been very effective. I've learned to drop the food bowls over the fence to protect myself from being tackled. I discovered that apples are far easier for them to eat when they have been cut in half and that carrots look rather disgusting when they have been frozen and thawed, but are apparently much tastier that way. I have also learned that both Riley and Petunia love company and will follow us all over the field, as long as they aren't trying to eat. If they are trying to eat, everyone else ceases to exist. I have noticed how much they love each other and that they don't seem to spend any time apart. If they do get separated they play their own version of Marco Polo to compensate for the tall weeds and Riley's poor vision. Of course, once again, if food is present all bets are off.

Well, this post has gotten quite long enough. I will be posting updates (hopefully) regularly and (again hopefully) there will be pictures on Facebook soon. If anyone is interested in visiting Riley and Petunia please contact me. They are quite fond of visitors, especially visitors who bring snacks.

This ^ was Riley and Tuni's first day with me.

My New Favorite Mythical Being

My dad and I have been watching Beastmaster lately. We used to watch it back when I was a kid, and I liked it then, but I was pretty skeptical about whether or not I would like it now. I must admit, some of the acting is pretty bad, and most of the special effects are really bad, but the writing is good, the fight choreography is cool, and I really enjoy the overall theme of the show. It's very much about protecting animals and the planet, and living in harmony with nature. They have even (on multiple occasions) compared killing/enslaving animals with killing/enslaving humans, which I find pretty exciting.

Anyway, there is this one character, named Curupira, who is a demon responsible for protecting the forest and all the animals who live there. She basically loves animals and the forest and hates humans. She frequently kills people who come into the forest and kill the animals or disrupt the natural order. Here's the best part though; she's not a villain. She kills someone nearly every time she shows up, but everybody kind of just acts like "Well yeah, they shouldn't have fucked with her forest."

Well, after I saw her on the show, I had to look it up and she if there was a real legend about Curupira, or if the writers made her up. Turns out there is a real legend, though apparently the real Curupira is male, not female. Still, most of the basics of the story are the same and I love it!

You want to know the weird thing though? I took a short hiatus from reading Deadpool to read Neil Gaiman's Black Orchid, and guess who was mentioned? I don't know why that happens to me so often. I hear about some random thing I've never heard of before, and then it just keeps popping up all over the place.

Another Bright Idea

Yesterday my mom, my sister and I went to pick blueberries. I thought that it might be nice to dry some of my own fruit. See, I eat a shit-ton of raisins and I've been wanting to try something else, but everything is just too fucking expensive. So instead, I thought I would buy a dehydrator, then spend a couple hours picking berries, then pay eighteen dollars a gallon for them, then spend many hours letting them dry, after which they will most likely not add up to enough to last me for more than a week. Yet another of my brilliant ideas in action.

Also, the blueberry bushes were covered in weird, angry caterpillars. Like these^.

Once More with Feeling

I finally found someone else to move my camper! He is doing it for the same price that I had agreed on with the first guy, which is nice since everyone else seemed to want twice that much. Supposedly he is going to pick it up on Saturday, and I should have it by Sunday. Also, I think my dad and I are going to go buy some stuff for my pump-house tomorrow, so that I can have running water sometime in the near future. Maybe, just maybe, things are starting to come together. Maybe.

No, Buffy. Not until the thing is actually sitting in my yard.....but then? Definitely! 

Home

I just thought I would go ahead and explain to all of you why having my own space is so important to me that I'm willing to go through all of this fucking hassle just to get a shitty, thirty year old, camper to live in. The things is, I haven't had a place that feels like home to me since.....well....forever. I mean, I'm sure there was a time when I was a kid that I felt at home in my house, but I don't remember it. As long as I can remember, I have been trying to squeeze myself, and my life, and all my stuff, into someone else's space. I've never had a place where I felt comfortable. I've never had a place where I felt at home. I've never had a place that was mine. I need a retreat, a sanctuary, a place where I can go to feel at ease when I just can't deal with the world anymore. I need to know that there is one single place in the world where I can go where I won't have to pretend, or tip-toe around, or try to work my way around other people's stuff. I just need that feeling of home.

Ganglion Cyst Smash (Video)

That weird-ass lump on my hand came back, so I got my sister to smash it for me again. And this time you guy get to watch. You're welcome.

That's Two Points for Me

You guys know by now that 1- I like weird things, and 2- When I like things, I like them A LOT. Well,  the fact that I like things that most people don't like means that I often have no one to talk to about the things I like (okay, I keep saying "like" when I really mean "LOVE!"). I mean, my dad does like a lot of the same shows I do, but he usually only half pays attention to them and doesn't read nearly as much into them as I do. My mom has never liked any kind of Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Horror, etc, at all. She usually just refused to even watch those sorts of things. But I think I'm starting to bring her around to my side. I convinced her to watch Supernatural a while back, and she liked it so much that she has now watched the whole thing (seasons 1-8) with me, twice. I had been trying for a while to get her to give Firefly a try and she finally agreed, and guess what? She likes it!

Sexiest Vegan Next Door Contest

Okay, so I decided to enter PETA's Sexiest Vegan Next Door Contest. I know it's kind of stupid but, I don't know, I thought it might be kind of fun. Every year, PETA send out their announcement about the contest, and every year I think "You know what? That sounds like it might be kind of fun." Well, this year I realized that if I wait much longer I'm going to feel too old to enter without feeling weird about it. So, fuck it! I'm doing it. Anyway, my sister does photography so I got her to take some pictures for me today. She is excellent and you should "Like" her Facebook page. Also, let me know which picture you think I should use for the contest. I'm currently leaning toward this one.

How About if Everybody Just Calms the Fuck Down?

My dad is out of town for a couple of days, so I actually have the house to myself for the first time in I don't even know how long. This would be kind of nice, were it not for the fact that all of the animals like him better than me and are therefore throwing a collective fit! Every one of them is completely spazzing out and being a general pain in my ass. So instead of having some nice time to myself, I have every animal in the house following me around and looking at me like "Why did it have to him who disappeared and not you?!" Also, barking, lots and lots of barking.

Basically they're acting like this. 

Sacrifice

A couple of days ago, my dad and I watched the Angel episode "Sacrifice." At the end of the episode, my dad asked me why it had been called that and I pointed out that the bug demon told Wesley that love was sacrifice. This led to a long and rather frustrating debate about what that actually meant, whether it was true, whether love was really a good thing assuming it was true, and eventually the definition of sacrifice. Well, in case anyone cares, here is my thought on the whole thing. Yes. Love is sacrifice, absolutely. Here's the thing though; so is everything else. Everything in life is about sacrifice. Everything. We are constantly, like every moment of every day, giving up one thing (or many things) for the sake of something else. We sacrifice; money, attention, progress, success, and most importantly time. Every single second we spend doing one thing could be spent doing something else. The question is whether or not the sacrifice is worth it. At the end of the day, how many of our choices are we really satisfied with? How many times do we feel like we chose the right things to use up our time and energy on? That's where love comes in. The important thing about love is, at least in my opinion, that it makes the sacrifice seem worth it.

^Bug demon^ for those who haven't seen the show. 

I Don't Get It

Did I ever tell you guys about how Impala likes to have sex with my clothes sometimes? Well he does. He also like to carry my clothes around the house for no apparent reason. Last night, my dad and I were sitting in the living room watching Angel and Impala just comes wandering into the room carrying one of my shirts in his mouth. This was the shirt I had slept in the previous night and I had left it lying on the floor in my room, upstairs. Yes, he carried my shirt down the stairs and into the living room. He then proceeded to drag it aimlessly around the room before wandering off again. At the time, I thought "I'll probably never see that shirt again." because he has been known to take my clothes and hide them under random pieces of furniture, I guess so I won't take them back? Later, when I went upstairs to go to bed, there was the shirt just lying at the top of the stairs. So, just to recap, he took my shirt from my bedroom floor, dragged it down the stairs, brought it into the living room, wandered around with it for a moment, then dragged it back up the stairs and put it back a few feet from where it was to begin with. Why? I just........why?