I'm All of Them, But None of Them Is Me

Recently, my mom and I were talking about the idea of changing for other people. This is something that happens quite a lot in romantic relationships, but I think it probably happens fairly often in any kind of relationship. We all want to be accepted by the people we care about, so we pretend to be what they want us to be. I think it's pretty much accepted as fact that this is a mistake. We shouldn't change for people. However, I think it is an inevitability that we will be changed by people. When you think about it, most of what we are is a composite of all of the people we have known. We absorb things from others, often without even realizing it. Our tastes, our mannerisms, our vocabularies, are all determined by the people we spend time with. I don't know, but I actually think this (as opposed to consciously choosing to change the way you are) can be a very good thing. I think it's a big part of how we grow and evolve. We see things that we like in others and some part of us adopts them for itself. We are who we are because of the people we've known.

* The title is a quote from this^ scene in Dollhouse.