Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Don't Judge Me

You know how, when you find something you really like, you automatically want to introduce other people to it? Like if you find a new favorite song, you want all of your friends and family to listen to it so they can love it as much as you do? Then do you ever suddenly become self-conscious and overly protective of said song as soon as you play it for someone else and realize they don' like it as much as you do?

I'm fairly certain I get a little too emotionally attached to my favorite forms of entertainment. All of my music, books, movies, TVs shows, whatever, mean more to me than they really should. Music especially has always been a very personal thing for me; I honestly find it difficult to answer the question "What kind of music do you like?" I mean, that's supposed to be one of those super easy conversation starter questions right? Not for me. I tend to say things like "Oh, a little bit of everything really." or "I like all kinds." because I can't bring myself to actually discuss what I really like in fear that the other person will give me a hard time about it and then I'll end up hating them.

When I do try to share my favorite things with other people, they tend to not understand at all. Then I start feeling like I have to either defend it in some way or pretend that I don't like it as much as I actually do, which feels like some sort of a betrayal. If someone goes so far as to insult something I like I have a very difficult time not getting disproportionately angry at them. I don't know if other people feel this way or not (if I had to guess, I would say not) but if you insult something I love you might as well be insulting the very core of my being.
I think Dean knows where I'm coming from here. 

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