HALP!

Okay, so I didn't tell you guys about this because I didn't want to get ahead of myself and start going on and on about yet another thing that will never actually happen. The problem is, I really need this one to happen or I'm honestly going to fucking snap. I simply cannot continue to live in my dad's house. I've spent my entire life living with other people, and I just need my own fucking space! Like now!

So my mom and I have been looking for a trailer that I can put near my dad's house (because none of my other ideas about getting my own place are anywhere near feasible right now). I actually found one that, while kind of grungy and generally shitty, has everything I need to make it into what I want.

It has a "cathedral ceiling" (which sounds rather absurd in reference to a trailer, but whatever) which is perfect for me, so I can do all of my crazy workouts without crashing into the ceiling, and I could actually set up my stripper pole. It also come with a refrigerator, and a washer and dryer. And it's free!

Here's the problem though, we can't find anyone to haul the fucking thing for me. It's on a hill, at the top of a kind of pot-holey, gravelly, driveway and apparently that's more of a pain in the ass than professional trailer movers are willing to deal with. I mean I would totally understand if they wanted to charge us more for dealing with this, I'm totally fine with that, but we can't find anyone to do it at all.

So, if anyone out there knows of anyone who can, and has the necessary equipment to, move and set up a trailer and would be willing to help me out with this I would greatly appreciate it! Seriously, the fate of my sanity rests on your shoulders!

 

My Cover Is Blown

Last night the New Instructor's Girlfriend was there. When I came in, he turned to her and said "Whitney is the one with the knife in her boot." Then he turned to me and said "I told her. I told everyone!" and I was like "You've let my secret out!" I mean really, how am I supposed to be an assassin if he goes around telling everyone?

Anyway, things went well. I ended up working with the same guy I worked with last week, and he seems cool. We worked on combinations with punches kicks and blocks, and I feel like we did pretty decent. 

It looks like I may have to take a break from class for a while soon though. The New Instructor is leaving in two weeks and will be gone until August. Apparently, they are getting some new guy to take over most of the classes, but he can't do Fridays. Oh well, I guess I'll jut have to find some new outlet for my aggression for a month and a half. 

Ⓥ Tips and Tricks Part 1; Food

I've been vegan for over ten years now and, while I know I take the whole thing a bit farther than most vegans do, I feel like I have, over the years, acquired a fair amount of useful knowledge. So I just thought I would share some helpful tips with you. This is information that I feel would be of use to anyone who is new to veganism, is thinking of becoming vegan, or is simply interested in limiting their contribution to animal exploitation.

1-Whenever anyone asks me for advice on becoming vegan, the first thing I always say is "Buy a rice cooker." Honestly, this appliance has been the most useful thing I have ever owned. I have never found a single grain that doesn't cook perfectly in my rice-cooker, and without any real effort on my part. It doesn't just have to be grains either; for the most part, you can just throw all of your ingredients in there at the same time, and just leave them until it shuts off. Seriously, it will change your life.

2- I, personally, do not like to cook (hence my reliance on the rice-cooker) but, if you do like to cook, Pinterest is probably the best place to find vegan recipes. Just type in "vegan" at the top, and I guarantee you will find endless delicious recipes for anything you could imagine.

3- When it comes to buying vegan and cruelty-free products (without unlimited financial resources), I find that the secret is to know where to shop. Two of my favorite places to shop for vegan food and other products are Vitacost and iHerb. They both have similar products, but each has some that the other doesn't and the price differs one way or the other between the two, depending on the product. Still, it is well worth a little checking back and forth to get good quality stuff without spending a ton of money.

4- Personally, I like to keep things simple (again, cooking is not my thing) so I tend to have a few basic staple foods that I rely on. I think my very favorite staple foods are nut and seed butters, especially almond butter. They are delicious in pretty much any way you want to use them; sandwiches, dips, sauces, spreads, whatever.

5- Another great staple food I found recently is teff. If you haven't heard of it, it's a tiny grain from Ethiopia that is full of all sorts of nutrients, and very high in protein. It tends to cook into a big clump, but if you just fluff it with a fork it gets a really nice sort of couscous-like texture. I love it!

6- Anyone who has been vegan for any length of time probably knows about nutritional yeast. It is a great way to add a slightly cheesy taste to any food. Plus, again, full of great nutrients (including the elusive B12). Also, most cats absolutely love the stuff. This was the only way I got my, exceptionally picky, cat on a vegan diet.

7- Speaking of vegan companion animals, Evolution Diet is the best vegan "pet" food around. I won't pretend that it's cheap, but it's worth the price. My animals have all done remarkably well on it, and are healthier than they ever were on meat-based foods. A lot of other people have had similar experiences.

8- For the longest time, I refused to use any sort of protein supplement because I didn't want it to seem like I thought my diet was deficient in any way. I absolutely still stand by that, I easily get everything I need in order to be healthy with no help from supplements. However, when I started working out more, I realized that all of these meat-eaters who work out were drinking protein shakes in order to build muscle. So I thought "if they can do it without people assuming their diets are deficient, then so can I!" I've been drinking Sunwarrior for several months now, and it has definitely made a huge difference for me. It took some getting used to because, as I said, I've never had protein powder before, but I've grown to really enjoy the stuff.

9- If you're looking for a quick, healthy, vegan snack, I recommend larabars. Most of them are made of only fruit and nuts, and they taste great. Be careful though, they used to all be vegan but they have come out with a few new flavors that aren't. Just look for "vegan" on the label.

10- Probably the most expensive, and unnecessary product I buy is Solar Energy Gum. The way I see it though, if chewing gum is my only real vice, I can afford to splurge a bit on it. You might not guess it, but vegan gum is kind of hard to find, and even when it is vegan it's still usually full of nasty chemicals. This one is healthy though, and has a ton of B vitamins to help give you energy (hence the name). Okay, this isn't really a food, but close enough.

The Best Part of Waking Up.....Is Deadpool

I have been on this serious Deadpool kick lately. Remember when I mentioned that I had been reading a whole bunch of book that I felt like I should read, for one reason or another? I feel like I've also mentioned that I'm almost always reading two books at once, but I can't seem to find where I said that, so maybe I didn't. Anyway, I'm almost always reading two books at once (there, now I said it), one that's informative, or intellectual, or important in some way, and one that's just entertaining. So lately I've been reading famous and influential literary works.....and Deadpool comics. I always read for at least an hour in the mornings and, if it's something I really like, it helps me to be in a better mood for the rest of the day. I must say, I have not found anything that helps me start of the day on a high note better than Deadpool. He's just so fucking hilarious, and weird, and insane, and I love it!

Unfortunately for me, comics are a lot more expensive than regular books, and there are a shit-ton of Deadpool comics out there. So I have wracked up a rather ridiculous balance on my new Amazon credit card recently. But hey, what can you do?

Hand-stand Push-ups (Video)

I couldn't think of anything good to do for my video this week, so I filmed myself (kind of) doing hand-stand push-ups. I don't know if you guys remember, but that was one of my goals for this year. I can't quite do them properly yet, but I think it's still the most impressive thing I've got right now. Also, you can get a look at the hole (well, one of the holes) I knocked in my wall.

In case you guys were wondering why I always post an image that looks exactly like the video, it's because Pinterest won't let me pin videos from here. I have no idea why. 

Mysterious

Yesterday, my mom, my sister, and I went to The Mystery Hole which, in case you were wondering, is pretty much the same thing as the Mystery Spot from Supernatural, only I think this one was even more cheesy than the one from Supernatural. That's what we were expecting though, so it worked out okay and I, personally, thought it was pretty fun. The majority of the tour took place in a room that was tilted to the side. They had a ball that rolled uphill, and water that flowed uphill, and a chair that stood on the wall.

There was also a couch in the room and the tour guide had three people sit there when we came in, then when we were leaving he told them to stand up from the couch without using their arms. None of them could do it. Then, after they finally did manage to get up, he asked if anyone else wanted to try it. My mom said "I'll bet you could do it." Then my sister was like "Yeah, try it!" So I did......and just stood right up. I'm not sure what the deal is, something about body mass vs. muscle mass maybe? Anyway, it was kind of cool. Then my sister was like "Good job, you just ruined that guy(the tour guide)'s whole day." Which is probably true actually. Also, I bought one of those plastic rainbow slinkys in the gift shop, because I wanted a souvenir that could reference two Supernatural episodes at once.

I was a little disappointed though because they had music playing the whole time, and they never played Heat of the Moment. I mean, come on!  

For Me

In the course of the conversation I mentioned yesterday, my mom also said something about how in order to feel better about yourself, you have to do things that make you feel good about yourself and stop doing things that make you feel bad about yourself. I then informed her that that is basically what my entire life is about. I try my best to do things that I feel I should do; because they are the right thing to do, or because I feel that they will help me to grow as a person, because they will help me to gain some skill or knowledge that I want to have, or simply because they help me to look/feel/act like the person I really want to be. I also do my best to never do things that I feel are wrong or simply unappealing, because I know that I lose respect for myself when I do those things.

My mom seemed to be under the impression that I put so much effort into certain things because I'm trying to impress other people, but that's not the case. I work so hard on myself because it makes me feel better, not because I except anyone else to care. If I were simply trying to attract other people I would do quite a few things differently. 1- I wouldn't work out as much. Most people don't seem to think being really muscular is appealing for a girl. 2- When I did workout I would probably do fucking Zumba or something instead of the martial arts type stuff I do now. 3- I would spend more time trying to do things with my hair/makeup/whatever that look like what other girls do, and less time trying to do things that I think look cool. 4- I would probably also stop dressing like I might be on my way to comic con.....

^The Guild. If you haven't seen it, it's pretty hilarious, and who doesn't love Felicia Day? 

I'm Not Good with Emotion Stuff

The last couple of days, my mom and have been having this on-again-off-again conversation about what I look for in other people, specifically romantically, but also just in general. Since I don't really have any other people, it obviously doesn't really matter, but whatever. Anyway, I was thinking about what I would want in another person, if I had the luxury of being particular about it. If I could choose my perfect mate it would be someone who is.....

1-Vegan (or at least has the potential to maybe become vegan someday, if things got serious between us) I figured I might as well go ahead and get that one out of the way.

2- Half as concerned as I am about taking care of their body. Not even necessarily because I prefer the appearance of people who are fit (though that is a bonus) but because it reflects a certain outlook and lifestyle.

3- Basically a good person, but no necessarily an especially nice person. I like people who care about doing the right thing, but I also like people who can be assholes at times (because I can be kind of an asshole at times and nice people make me feel guilty for that.)

4- At least somewhat of a thrill seeker. I want someone who will do all of the things I've always wanted to do, but never wanted to do alone, with me.

5- Either as concerned as I am about germs, or is understanding enough to act like they are anyway.

6- Willing to stand up for me on the rare occasion when I actually have a conflict with someone. This is not because I want someone who will fight my battles for me, but just because I need someone who I know will have my back.

7- Not concerned about impressing people. I'm never going to be impressive, and I don't want to have to try to be.

8- Interested in at least some of the same things I am; shows, books, activities, whatever.

9- Okay with the fact that I am completely terrible at any and all things dealing with emotion. I do my best to be emotionally supportive, but it never quite works out the way I want it to.

10- (Here's the one that's the real problem; you would think it would be the first one, but no.) Able to make me feel comfortable around them. There are just certain people who I can talk to, and certain people I can't, and the latter are far more common. I honestly have no idea what it is that determines whether I feel comfortable with someone or not, and that makes it damn near impossible to find those people.

The title is a quote from J ^. If you haven't seen My First Mister, go watch it now!

I Want to Be Sara Lance When I Grow Up

Last night at class there were two other guys there, and the New Instructor. I'm not entirely sure what the one guy was doing, he kind of seemed to just be hanging out. So I ended up practicing kicks with the one guy while the Instructor watched and corrected us. It worked out pretty well.

Then, when we were leaving, I was putting my boots on and the Instructor said "Is that a knife in your boot?" It was, I don't know if I told you guys about that or not, but I keep a knife in my boot (just because I think it's cool.....I don't know). I said "Yeah, it is."  The other two guys simultaneously say "Really?!" and the Instructor goes "Can I see it?" They looked at the knife and discussed it for a minute, then the Instructor said "Are you an assassin?" and then laughed and said "A vegan assassin." To which I replied "No one ever expects it."

I do think it would be kind of a fun job.

Ⓥ Health

I have talked a little before about my feelings in regard to people, particularly celebrities, who give up their vegan diets due to alleged "health problems." I recently found this article from Bonzai Aphrodite on the subject of health issues as they relate to veganism. It is a really excellent article, and it made me rethink my stance on the issue (slightly).

To be honest, when I hear about people who develop health issue while on a vegan diet, it never even enters my mind that they might be telling the truth. I have always just assumed that it was an excuse for giving up a lifestyle that they simply found too inconvenient. I thought that claiming to need meat and other animal products in order to be healthy was simply a way to get out of doing the morally correct thing without looking, to everyone else, like someone who lacks the conviction to stick to his or her beliefs.

After reading this article I realized that, while I still absolutely do not believe that a vegan diet actually causes health issues, there may be certain health problems that would be easier to mange on a non-vegan diet. I truly believe that a vegan diet is healthier overall than a meat-based diet, but it does not automatically prevent all illnesses and it may make handling illnesses a bit more difficult, at times.

The woman from the article developed deficiencies in several different nutrients after giving birth and was told that the best way to handle them was to begin eating animal products again. She struggled with the issue for a long time before finally finding a solution that did not require her to sacrifice her beliefs. I truly admire her for her conviction and her unwillingness to do something that she found immoral, despite everything she was going through.

This article gave me a new perspective on people who give up veganism because of their health. It did not, however, change my mind about it altogether. I still believe that people who truly believe in animal rights will find a way (as the woman who wrote the article did) to stick to their beliefs no matter what. There is always a way to solve any issue, health or otherwise, while remaining true to your compassionate lifestyle. It may prove difficult, and frustrating, at times but it is always possible and those of us who truly care will manage to make it work.

This is the author of the article, I highly recommend you read it. I'm sure I didn't do it justice.

Heroes

I, for one, am very happy about this recent(ish) superhero trend in our culture.This is not just because I, personally, love superheroes (which, as you all know, I do!), but because I think it's a good sign for our society. I know that sounds kind of ridiculous, but let me explain.

I believe that superhero stories are basically the myths of our modern world, and I think that myths are very important. Every ancient culture had it's own set of heroes, people who achieved extraordinary and courageous things. I think these stories are partly responsible for all of the amazing things humans have accomplished throughout history. You see, when we hear stories about people who do great things, it makes us want to do great things as well.

For most of human history, this is what we wanted; stories of the courage and strength of great people. Then at some point in more recent times, we lost this. We decided that we wanted stories that were more "relatable". We wanted stories of people who were just like us, doing the things that we do everyday. Here's the thing though, we always manage to relate to stories, I think that's something that's just built into our DNA. When we relate to stories heroes, it brings out the heroic side in us. When we relate to people who are just like us, or worse than us, it only makes us inclined to be satisfied with our own mediocrity.

So, it seems to me that, the fact that we are becoming interested in these kinds of stories again might mean that we are looking for people to inspire us to be better than we are. Sure, these people aren't real, but better to be inspired by fictional people than to watch a bunch of real people acting like assholes and making fools of themselves ({cough} Jersey Shore {cough} The Kardashians {cough} every other reality show ever). I guess what I'm saying is that maybe, just maybe, the reemergence of heroes in popular culture is a sign that we are, once again, ready to face our own potential for greatness and look past what we are to what we could be.

There are even more superheroes coming to the CW next season. If you watch Arrow (and you're anything like me) you will observe who the girl in white is, and then you will do a happy dance. 

Or a Train.....or Something...

This past Sunday, I was helping my dad dig holes so he can put a fence around his garden. He bought this auger that requires two people to run it, one on each side. The thing actually worked quite well, except for the fact that it occasionally tried to kill us. You see, every time it would hit a rock, it would suddenly stop and jerk violently to the side. This resulted in me also being thrown sideways. There were at least four times that it slammed my head directly into my dad's head. The last time, it honestly felt like a fucking car crash or something; it slammed our heads together, wrenched my arms sideways, and knocked me clear down. So yeah, good times.

Sorry for the terrible pop-culture reference. I couldn't help myself.

Adventure (Video)

I decided to film one of my poems, to see if I could do a better job on film than I can in front of real people. I still didn't do that great, but I think I did much better than when I performed it live. This is one of my favorite ones that I've written, and I thought it would be a good one to start with. Also, I used the camera my sister bought me a while back this time, instead of the GoPro, and I think the audio came out a lot better. Anyway, I hope you guys like it.

Mad Max

My sister and I went to see Mad Max last night. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I never actually saw the original but, based on the bits and pieces that I did see, I'm pretty sure it wasn't much like this one. I could be wrong, but I got the distinct impression that the original was basically just a bunch of guys trying to kill each other in the desert. This one, while still maintaining an abundance of action scenes, also had quite a good story and some serious feminist overtones (which I am fairly certain were not in the original). Anyway, it was a very weird, but cool movie. And Charlize Theron's character was amazing! I would recommend it (you will have to overlook the creepy scene right at the beginning in which Max eats a live lizard though. That was just unnecessary).

Also, this morning, I was reading Fragile Things, by Neil Gaiman and there was this part where the narrator was talking about going to watch a performance and he says that he thinks whoever designed the costumes watched Mad Max too many times. Jut another of those weird little coincidences that follow me around and make me feel uncomfortable.

The whole movie, every time they showed this ^ guy, I kept thinking "Is that the guy from Warm Bodies?" then I would think "No, that's stupid. You just think that because he's wearing the same makeup." But no. That is, in fact, the same guy. Apparently he is the go-to actor when you need someone who can pull off the corpse look. 

Let's Put It to a Vote

Lately, I have been trying to come up with something different to do with my hair. I'm fairly happy with the color, at this point, but the cut has been bugging me. The problem is, because my hair is the way it is, I just don't have many options. I tried letting it get a little longer for a while, but that looked worse. Yesterday I was just fucking around with my hair, out of boredom, and I kind of smashed it upward into a sort of faux-hawk type thing......and I kind of liked it. So today I decided to try it that way and see if I actually liked it or not. I still can't decide. So what do you guys think? Can I pull off the faux-hawk or not?

Works for Me

Last night at class both instructors were there and there was only one other student, a guy I've never seen before. I'm not sure what happened to everyone else, maybe they all went home for the summer? Anyway, it worked out pretty well for me because we each got to work one-on-one with an instructor the whole time. So I got a chance to get some pretty good practice in, and actually know that I was doing it the right way. We worked on punches and then kicks, which I have obviously done many times before, but it was still nice to get some good practice and feedback.

Ⓥ Speaking of Wastefulness

Yesterday I was talking a little about my feelings regarding wastefulness. I am deeply bothered by our society's views on this subject, and our obsession with convenience over conservation. As I said yesterday, I try to do everything I can to prevent waste. However, there is one idea about wastefulness, which everyone else seems to share, that I simply do not understand. That is the idea that it is better to eat more food than you want, simply because it is already on your plate, than to throw it away. I am all for not throwing food away, but I accomplish this by saving it for the next day, as opposed to just eating it right then when I don't particularly want it. The idea that eating more food than you want, or need, is somehow less wasteful than throwing it away seems inherently absurd to me.

We've all heard the argument that we should eat all our food because "there are starving kids in Africa". What I would like to know is, does anyone actually believe that starving kids would feel better about their own situation knowing that we were eating an excess of food rather than throwing it away? Is that, in any way, better? The truth of the matter is, any food beyond what you need is wasted, whether you eat it or not. And I'm fairly certain that anyone, anywhere, who is starving would be just as bothered by our overeating as they would by our throwing food away because, in essence, it is the same thing.

If we are being honest with ourselves which, let's face it, very few of us are we are, we have to admit that our entire way of life is basically a slap in the face to people who don't have enough to eat. If we want to help the "starving kids in Africa" the solution is not to eat more food than we care to eat at a time, it's to stop consuming more resources than we need, all the way around. We, as a society, take much more than we need, and much more than we have any right to. Instead of telling ourselves, and our children, to eat everything we have, what we should be doing is taking less in the first place.

Our entire system of food-production, as well as our system for producing pretty much everything else we use, is completely unsustainable. If we truly want to do something to help those who are starving, we need to start with abolishing animal agriculture (you all knew that was coming, right?). It is, by far, the most wasteful way we could possibly obtain food, and it is draining resources from everyone who needs them.

I recently found a version of this ^ that said "mock meat" and "soy pudding" and I really wanted to use that one, but I couldn't find it again. This one still works though. 

Too Far?

You know how our society is pretty much built around the idea of everything being disposable? and how most people are totally okay with the idea of just throwing things away if they don't want them? Well, I try so hard not to be like that that I think I have actually gone a little too far in the other direction. I feel overly guilty if I ever have to throw anything away.

I always make several days worth of food at once, and just eat it every day until it's gone. Sometimes though, I accidentally make more than I meant to and before it's gone I start to wonder if it's still good or not. But I feel really bad if I throw it away because I just keep thinking "That's two whole days worth of food!" So I usually just eat it anyway and hope that it doesn't poison me. So far it's worked out alright.

Also, e.l.f., the place where I buy my makeup, sells a lot of their stuff in sets. Even in a set, it's way cheaper than a single product from pretty much anywhere else. I hate buying stuff like that though, because I usually only want one or two of the things, not the others. I often end up buying something I don't really like instead, just because I can buy it individually. I'm always tempted to write to them and tell them that I would gladly pay three times as much just to buy the one thing I want by itself, instead of getting all the other things I will just have to get rid of.

I also continue to wear clothes long after they have holes in them, and boots long after they have ceased to be water-proof. This one time, I even saved a bunch of glass jars for months because they stopped taking them at the recycling places around here, and I just couldn't bring myself to throw them away. Finally I had to just give in and do it anyway. It was sad.

That'll Do, Pig-Girl

Do you ever feel like you know what people are saying about you, without them ever actually saying it to your face? I'm pretty sure that (at least to everyone who lives near me, if not to everyone else) I'm the crazy pig girl. As if having adopted pigs isn't weird enough, at least here in WV, I'm also just always doing strange stuff at my house and, when people happen to drive by, I can almost hear what they're thinking. "What is that crazy pig-girl doing now?" "Is that pig-girl trying to do cartwheels!?" "What the hell is that pig-girl doing standing on top of that trailer?" "Look, now that crazy fucking pig-girl is walking on the porch railing!" "What is that crazy pig-girl yelling about?!" (Usually it's because Petunia got mud up her nose and then snorted, when I tried to hand her a carrot, and blew a combination of mud and snot in my face). "What is that ridiculous thing they're building over there (the salmon ladder)? Weird fucking pig-girl!"

There was this weird show my dad and I used to watch years ago, called The Chronicle. There was a character called Pig-Boy ^ and yes that is, in fact, Metatron (Curtis Armstrong) with a pig nose. 

The First Volatile Vegan Video Is Up!

I did, in fact, post a video last night and it is now up on my Youtube channel Volatile Vegan Videos (because you guys know how much I love alliteration). Unfortunately, the audio is really fucking terrible. I tried watching it on four different computers; on one you could hear it, on one you could kind of hear it, and on the other two you couldn't hear it at all unless you had head phones. Anyway, sorry about that. I'm going to try to get that worked out before the next video. Mostly, I was just talking about Riley and Tuni's story, which you can find in much more detail here. I feel like it could have been a pretty decent video were it not for the audio issues. Hopefully it's at least good enough to give you guys some idea what I'm trying to do here.

Fingers Crossed

I'm thinking I really might have a video posted tomorrow! I finally downloaded the software onto my mom's computer today, and uploaded the video to her computer. Amazingly enough it actually came out okay; the audio is a little iffy, but I somehow did manage to film hat I was trying to film and not just my own feet. I think I even did sort of okay with the narration, even though I (for some reason) got all nervous as if I were talking in front of actual people, which is completely insane. Anyway, I'm currently working on uploading the video to my Youtube channel, which you can find here. I will also post it on this blog though, obviously.

Don't get too excited yet though, just in case.....

Mother's Day

Since I'm poor and can't buy a decent gift, I thought I would dedicate a blog post to my mom for Mother's Day (that's just as good.....right? Yeah, probably not but it's the best I have right now).

Anyway, I just wanted to do something to let her know how much she means to me. No matter what, she has always supported me in everything I've ever done, even though I'm pretty sure didn't understand why I wanted to do most of them. She has also always tried to understand the things I do, even though they are often totally ridiculous. She even tries her best to like the things that I like, and occasionally even does like them. She always does everything she can to make me feel better about myself, even when I'm basically just being a big leech on her. When we were growing up, she always made my sister and me feel like we were the most important things in her life, and she still does that now, even though we are adults and she shouldn't have to anymore.

Basically what I'm saying here is I love you, Mother, and thank you for always being there for me. I know you have always wanted only the best for me, and I hope you know that I want the same for you. I don't know if I'll ever be able to do half as much for you as you have for me, but I'm going to try.

Happy Mother's Day!

Where Is Stick When You Need Him?

Last night in class we worked on head kicks, which was cool except for the fact that we were just kicking into the air with no actual targets, and I simply cannot do anything right that way! I need something to hit (preferably something that hits back). When I try to punch or kick with no target, I just end up feeling like a complete ass and not coming anywhere near doing it right. Finally, after I had done it wrong like thirty times in a row, the New Instructor put his hand up for me to kick and I instantly did it (at least mostly) right, then he put it back down and I suddenly sucked again.

Also, at one point, I landed wrong and felt something shift in my ankle. Then I had this weird numb feeling in it for the rest of the class, which just made me even worse at everything than I already was. I was pretty sure I was going to wake up this morning with my ankle all swollen and nasty looking, but it's actually fine now. So I guess that was one good thing at least.

Seriously why can't I get training like I would if I were a comic book character?!

Ⓥ Riley and Petunia

I've mentioned Riley and Tuni here on several occasions, but I don't think I have ever told their whole back-story. To be honest, I don't even know their whole back-story, but I can tell you what I do know and the story of how they came to live with me. You probably already know that they were both rescued by Farm Sanctuary, and that I met them there during my first internship. I don't think I've really told you much more than that though.

They were both rescued by the Watkins Glen shelter when they were very young, Petunia was still drinking from a bottle when I first met her, and they had both been very small and very sickly. I think most people don't realize how large pigs actually get, if allowed to live long enough, but despite the fact that I would guess Riley to be at least 400 pounds and Tuni is only slightly smaller, they aren't nearly as large as most of the pigs I met at Farm Sanctuary, due to their poor health when they little.

Riley developed a severe infection shortly after he was born. He was nonetheless taken to a stock sale, where he was simply ignored because no one wanted to buy a sick piglet. Farm Sanctuary found him and took him to an animal hospital, but the infection had already spread to his ear and eye. He eventually recovered, but he lost the eye, and still has trouble hearing. When I met him, he was living with two other pigs and seemed to be doing very well physically, but was having trouble socially because of his size and disability. They decided that the best thing would be for him to be adopted out so that he wouldn't be picked on by other pigs.

Petunia was born with a hernia, and was also significantly smaller than her brothers and sisters. The farmer decided to "donate" her to Cornell's veterinary program so that they could use her to teach the students about hernia surgery. Luckily, Farm Sanctuary has a good relationship with Cornell because they take so many animals there. So Cornell told Farm Sanctuary about Petunia, and said that they would save her life, as opposed to just using her for practice, as long as Farm Sanctuary took her in and paid for the surgery. When I started my internship, she was living in the office because she was much too small to be out with the other pigs. Everyone at the sanctuary was completely in love with her because she was just so full of energy. She loved people and was constantly jumping around and squeaking, trying to get everyone's attention. Since it was pretty obvious that her growth would be stunted, they though that she too would be better off someplace where she wouldn't have to worry about fighting off larger pigs.

It was shortly before my internship ended that I heard that Riley and Tuni were going to be adopted out, and I had gotten so attached to both of them that I instantly called my dad to talk to him about whether or not we could get a place ready for them in time. He agreed to help me, and I went to talk to the director about it. She told me that I was the first intern who had ever adopted one of the animals, other than a few cats over the years. I went back home for a couple of months so that my dad and I could build a barn and fence off an acre of land for them. Then Farm Sanctuary sent two guys with a huge trailer to bring them to West Virginia.

So that's the story of Riley and Tuni, and how they came to live with me. They are both in very good health these days and, aside from fighting over food, they seem to be pretty happy together most of the time.

That's Riley in the front, and Tuni's ear sticking up behind him.

I'm Living in a Horror Movie

I haven't used my punching bag for a long time, because I fucked up my hand a while back, and using the punching bag was stopping it from healing properly. Meanwhile, I have recently noticed these weird little weevil-like bugs in my workout room. I hadn't been all that bothered by them, because there were only a few of them, here and there, plus they're tiny. I had noticed though that they like to hang out on my punching bag, but I didn't really think much of it.

Well, today I decided that my hand was finally healed enough that I could use the bag again. So I spent a few minutes with it, at the end of my workout. As I'm leaving the room, I look up at the top of the bag and there are literally hundreds of the little weevil bugs crawling out of the zipper! I just sort of stood there in shock for a minute and then I noticed this strange, very quiet, rustling noise. I leaned my ear a little closer to the bag and realized it was coming from inside. I'm fairly certain the whole thing is completely full of bugs! There must be thousands of them in there, and I clearly pissed them all off by punching them.

Here's the best part, I couldn't really do anything about it. I would have liked to take the thing outside and dump it out, but it weighs 100 pounds and is hanging from the ceiling; I could move it by myself, but I'm afraid that if I jostle it too much trying to get it down from the ceiling, or down the stairs the bugs will get even angrier and swarm me. I mean, they're not very threatening as individuals, but when you get that many of them together.......no thanks. So I guess I'll have to get my dad to help me carry the thing outside, and just hope that we can be gentle enough that they won't know what's going on. Also, I really hope that the ones who came out today go back inside instead of spreading out all over my room.

Seriously, how did my life turn into everyone's least favorite episode of Supernatural? 

So Close....

I actually attempted to make a video for you guys today but, alas, I've failed yet again. Well, I did actually make a video, at least in theory, but I still can't post it.

You see, I have encountered a few issues which I was not aware of when I had this whole video blog idea. 1- I'm thinking that, despite it's durability (which is why I bought it), a GoPro was probably not my best option. It turns out it has neither a playback option, nor a viewfinder of any kind. In order to know what you have been filming, you have to upload the video and watch it on your computer. Which means that the video I filmed today my have been of my own knees, for all I know. 2- I wasn't thinking about the fact that I would need video editing software. I'm still not certain, but I don't think I can actually get it on this computer, since it's not a real computer (It's a Chromebook). So it looks like I may have to download the software on my mom's computer and edit them from there. Why exactly is it that everything I try to do turns out to be a giant pain in the ass?

Perhaps I should have just gone all-out with my equipment like the Ghostfacers. 

Necessities

Do you have certain things that you absolutely need in order to feel good about yourself? Like random, stupid little things that (for some reason) have an inordinate amount of influence on your self-esteem? Because I definitely do. I mean, I knew this about myself. I've always spent a great deal of time and energy doing things simply because they make me feel better about myself. I did not realize until this weekend though, how crucial mascara is to my self-image. I know it's stupid, but apparently eyelashes are very important to me.

I normally buy all of my makeup online, mostly from e.l.f. because they are cheap, non-animal tested, and vegan (which, in case you didn't know, is almost unheard-of), plus I just really like their stuff. This last time, I accidentally ordered the wrong kind of mascara, and then spent the entire weekend feeling ridiculously self-conscious. It just wasn't the same as the one I normally use, and made my lashes show up about half as much as they normally do. Of all the things that I could base my feelings about my appearance on, I really don't know why I would choose the one thing that people are probably the least likely to notice, but that's apparently what I did. Anyway, I finally went to Target and just hoped that they had the kind I wanted; luckily they did or I would be really freaking out right now. 

This ^ is the good one.

 

Two in a Row

Amazingly enough, Saturday actually ended up being a pretty good day too. My mom, my sister, and I went to Seneca Rocks. I had never been there before, and it was a really pretty place. We walked through the woods, and I climbed some grape vines while they mostly pretended not to know me. It was nice to actually do something outside. Plus, my sister got some great pictures. Also, we saw a mink, which was pretty cool. Well, they saw a mink, I saw a dark brown smudge, because I wasn't wearing my glasses but still pretty cool. On the way back, we stopped to eat at the Purple Fiddle. Again, they ate, I didn't. It has a pleasant atmosphere though, so I still enjoyed it. Anyway, we ended up staying out until like 11:00, and we barely bitched at each other at all. So yeah, pretty good day.

And, to be honest, yesterday really wasn't too bad either. I went with my sister to buy some clothes for her new job, and we actually found everything we were looking for. Now today.....Oh well, I guess a whole weekend without feeling like my life is a pile of shit was about as much as I should have hoped for anyway.

Still Flying

Sorry there was no post yesterday, my mom, my sister, and I were gone all day and didn't get back until it was way too late for me to care enough to write anything. Anyway, I'm going to go ahead and write what I was going to write yesterday.

Friday was a pretty good day, overall.
1- My friend Rachel helped my get some stuff figured out about my blog so that I can make it seem more like a real website. I now know how to add new pages, so that it can be more than just a blog. And I may even be able to sell stuff from here, so I won't have to go through Etsy anymore. So if anyone has any suggestion about things they would like to see here, let me know.

2- Rachel, my sister, and I then went to see Age of Ultron which was fantastic! I would just like to thank Marvel for this exchange as the opening lines of the movie..
Tony- Shit.
Steve- Language!

3- My sister went to class with me, which was pretty fun. Even though I think she kind of hated it. We worked more on footwork, so nothing terribly exciting, but it went well.

4- My SD card finally came so, if I can figure out how to do it, I am actually capable of making videos now.

Mal and I have similar ideas about what constitutes a good day. 

Ⓥ "Art"

Last weekend, my sister and I went to an art/craft sale in Morgantown. I took my jewelry and she took some of her photographs. The idea of the sale was to get some exposure for local artists. I have always thought of myself as a creative person, but not necessarily an artist. I have never been entirely certain about what actually classifies something as"art". It has always been my opinion that art should have a message, a goal, something to say, as well as an appeal.

Of course, whether or not there is a message present in a certain piece is pretty subjective. I know there are people who see deep meaning in things that I don't. I also know that there are plenty of people who don't like the kind of things that I make; my jewelry, poetry, etc. So I try to refrain from criticizing other people's art. However, there are some times when I think criticism is forgivable.

There was one person at the sale who brought a puzzle (not a hand-made puzzle, but one that they bought and put together) of a baby pig, with letters cut out of a magazine and glued to it. The letters read "When I grow up I want to taste great." I'm sorry, but that is not art. If it had been intended to, in some way, shed light on the absurdity of that statement, then sure. But I don't believe it was, and anything that does nothing but shamelessly defend the status quo, with absolutely no justification or alternate perspective, earns no artistic merit. As far as I'm concerned, this is the artistic equivalent of replying "Mmmmmm bacon" to a logical debate.

I have also recently seen many stories online about various "artists" torturing and killing animals to use in their art. Anything that requires the suffering of another being is also devoid of artistic value. I have seen artists who use their own bodies for their art, sometimes inflicting great pain on themselves in the process, and this I feel can truly be called art. To sacrifice your own body, or comfort, for the sake of expressing your message to the world shows true commitment to that message. To use the body of another in that way, only conveys your own sadism.

In my opinion, true art should have a soul, a conscience. It should have empathy and compassion, that is what gives it its power. Art without those things is empty, meaningless. Art should open our eyes; make us see things differently. It should make us want to be better people.

My favorite piece, by one of my favorite artists, Amanda Moeckel.